FrostClan: A Dark Tomorrow

"Cursepaw? Are you okay, or should I go get some herbs from Emeraldeye for you?" Deltapaw reappeared in the den after her younger friend, her stomach twisting with worry and her heart welling up, rich, bright eyes glowing softly with a certain sense of gentleness.

Cursepaw, slightly hyperventilating, choked out, "No...I-I'm fine. J-Just a few thorns that all. Heh-heh!" Her tiny laugh was nervous and her eyes darted around the den. She hated lying directly to Deltapaw, but she didn't want to disturb the medicine cat, who she knew had gone to the Moonstool not long ago.

Deltapaw sighed and plucked some moss away from her nest, which often still felt slightly empty without her brother. Trotting slowly over to the hurt she-cat, she gently stuck the fluffy mass against the open sores and meowed,"Its no cobweb, but it should hold. Now be careful next time!" There was a humorous hint to her tone, even if it was warning.

(Sorry for the short post- is really tired.)

"I will," Cursepaw mewed, settling down a bit, a faint smile creeping on her pained face. She rested her head on the moss of her nest, careful not to wriggle around too much. Her eyes drooped and she drifted off into a light slumber filled with inky blackness that was not dreams, but just blissful ignorance to whatever went on around her.

"What to do what to do" Ashenpaw thought boredly.She was in pain everday thinking of Blushard obviously mooning over Quartzprickle."She always wins" she thought."There is nothing left for me hear" she thought sadly.The last few weeks were filled with her doing the same thing of hunting eating and sleeping.She was hated all throughout the clan."Maybe hunting will make me feel better" she thought as she padded out of the camp.When she giot into the woods she went straight to her favorite hunting spot.As she tested the air for any trace of prey she heard movement in a bush atleast 5 tail lengths away.Then she spotted tail of a very fat rabbit.She crouched silently in fear of the rabbit hearing her.Then she moved slowly towards the bush.When she was 2 tail lengths away she pounced just in time to see the rabbit run away.She cursed silently.She hardly ever caught anything now, but why had the rabbit ran away she had been as silent as a mouse.

(Okay AP, as your 'mentor', I feel I should point some things out: Since you've been gone, the season has changed to winter and the forest is very short of prey. Also, only mods or extremely experienced RPers are allowed to call up foxes, badgers, and the like- just to keep it realistic. Also, perhaps addig a few spaces between sentences and add commas within the sentences when listing things. And just a tip- you can italisize you charrie's thoughts instead of having to say they 'thought' it out. Good luck now!)

(You do something dramatic that involves Ashenpaw I got nothing)

(I would, but my phone is slow and I'm jumping between being on here and working on my house. Maybe Tor could do something for you- she counts as one of the experienced people to pull up enemies.)

(KK, Tor you do something.)

(You're damn straight I'm experienced. And my writer's block is fading. I can do something for you.)

A deep snarl emanated from within the forest, permeating the air with its hostile tone. The overpowering scent of fox washed over the forest, blocking whatever else a cat could possibly smell-prey, leaves, even the few clinging flowers or herbs that revolted against the snow. A lithe, red shape darted out in front of Ashenpaw, lips drawn back in a sneer. It growled menacingly, showing its gleaming white fangs. It's cold eyes glowed with hunger as it lunged for the untrained she-cat, bushy tail waving through the air.

Ashenpaw raced through the woods trying to find a cat to help her fight off the fox.She knew that if she went to the camp everyone would be ion danger so she yelled out for help "Someone help theres a fox".

(Punctuate your statements. Instead of "Someone help theres a fox"., it would most likely be, "Someone help, there's a fox!")

Vieledmist's, still being just outside of camp's boundaries, picked up the faint call for help and pelted towards the sound. He couldn't pick out the voice exactly, but it sounded like a she-cat's. He ruled out Quartzprickle and Featherpaw; their mew would always be more cynical that any other. Nor would it be Deltapaw, he knew, for she would sound much more terrified. It must be Cursepaw, Ashenpaw, or Enigmaheart, he decided, forgetting who was in camp and who wasn't.

The fox followed closely, almost within range of Ashenpaw's tail. Spittle flew from its sharp-toothed maw as it let out an enraged yowl. It's yell cut through the forest, loud and clear, making prey dash for cover and birds flit away, chirping their warnings to any critter who didn't hear the fox's ear-splitting cry.

Hearing the fox's cry being so close to her she darted faster into the forest.Again she yelled a cry for help " Please anyone help!".

Like a bird's shadow flitting across the ground, Vieledmist made a tremendous leap and barreled over the fox, pushing it to the ground and snarling fiercely. His lips curled back into a snarl to match the fox's and he snapped at its neck, his teeth sinking in just above the windpipe. He had missed a killing blow.
With another raging cry, the fox kicked with its powerful back legs and sent Vieledmist tumbling to the ground not a tail-length away. It lunged at him, quick as a frightened vole, and landed on his back with a crushing weight. The claws that donned its jet-black paws sunk into Vieledmist's shoulder, which made Frostclan's deputy emit a yowl of pain and rage-a fierce sound that tore out of the cat's throat, showing just how feral a civilized tom would become in danger.
He rolled, crushing the fox under his weight, but not immobilizing it, and his thorn-sharp claws slid out into the fox's back, right along his spine. He tore fur and skin of, all the while being slung around and clamping his jaws tightly on the fox's scruff. He let go momentarily, spitting out red fur, and yowled, "Ashenpaw! Get help!"

Shock running through hershe ran straight into the camp.She ran straight to the most experienced warrior she knew."Shadowcore theres a fox Veildmist needs help hurry and follow me!!" I said as I ran with Shadowcore behind me.

(Quartzprickle isn't a warrior; she's a huntress. I'd reccomend Shadowcore(because he's mine and I'm on) or Relicheart, if he hasn't left for the patrol. You could also ask for Shadderscream, even though he's a newb, or Hellspire.)

(I did)
Shock running through her she ran straight into the camp.She ran straight to the most experienced warrior she knew."Shadowcore there's a fox, Veildmist needs help please follow me!!" I said as I ran hoping Shadowcore was behind me.

"Fine," Shadowcore grumbled, dashing after the apprentice. He didn't need her guidance for long; he could hear the fierce snarls and smell fox mingled with blood before long. He appeared to see Vieledmist lunging for the fox's neck, but missing, his teeth sinking into it's chest. Vieledmist was then thrown off once more. Both were wounded, panting, and bloody. Shadowcore leaped into the fight, landing on the fox's back. Now that it was against two warriors, the fox's chance of victory had slimmed greatly. The three continued fighting, a flurry and claws and fur, until Shadowcore held the fox down and Vieledmist bit into its windpipe. Blood dribbled from its mouth and shock filled its eyes, then it was no more than a dead body.
"Be more careful next time," Shadowcore snapped at Ashenpaw.

"What's going on over here?!" A thick, heavy voice filled with anger and worry alike rose up. Relicheart stalked over with Deltapaw close on his tail. "We were on the guarding patrol and once we heard all your constant yowling, we had to leave Malicehaze and Enigmaheart to come running to your aid. Ashenpaw, you were screeching loud enough to have all the clans in the area come running to you!" His olive eyes glowed threateningly, unusual for the gentle outside of battle. His ears were pinned back and long black claws like wolves' fangs made of onyx buried themselves into the snow, through the ice, and into the ground.

Deltapaw flinched at the sight, her eyes glowing in wide fear. "Relicheart, sh-should I go get something for their wounds?!" She gasped as he shook his head.

"If they were strong enough to go track down foxes in the middle of Leafbare, then they're strong enough to make it back to camp and find Emeraldeye themselves. Ashenpaw! Don't you know the rules of hunting in groups when danger is afoot?! For this, you will be finished up every other apprentices' chores till the next Gathering!" As the large tom turned to walk away, he flicked his tail in humorous manner, adding," And try not to let the elders claw your tail off when cleaning their pelts for ticks and fleas!" With that, he urged Deltapaw away, and the two took off back to the direction of the Boulderclan border.

Vieledmist, still scowling slightly, trudged through the leafbare snow, leaving a trail of crimson, the Emeraldeye's den. Shadowcore followed closely behind him, but not as urgently, as his wounds were not in as many numbers or as serious.

"Emeraldeye?" Vieledmist called hoarsely, sticking his head into the den. One nicked badly, and half of the fur on his cheek was missing. Small chunks of skin stood out all over his body. The most noticeable wound, however, was a long, jagged gash on his back right leg. He limped into the den as Emeraldeye lifted his weary head.

"What happened to you?!" Emeraldeye asked incredulously, standing straight up with his pelt fluffed out in surprise. His eyes wide, he surveyed Vieledmist's wounds, noticing Shadowcore trailing behind the injured deputy.

"Fox. It wasn't that bad," Vieledmist mewed, wincing as he limped closer to the medicine cat.

"Sit down!" Emeraldeye ordered immediatly, "Better yet, lay down. Try not to move your leg, and don't get any dirt in it. The last thing we need is for the deputy ro be condemned in his nest with an infected wound." He was snatching herbs from their shelves, all the while chewing them. "Maismakit, help me! Get the cobwebs," He instructed, not thinking before he asked the kit's assistance.

The young she-cat was already at Emeraldeye's side, watery moss in her mouth and a large wad of cobwebs caught along her tail, which she held out for the medicine cat. She craned her small neck over so that Vieledmist could lap from the droplets, pattering against the ground as they fell from the moss. Her crimson eyes were blank and without emotion, but one could tell she was quite serious about what was happening.

Vieledmist lapped up a few drops of water from the moss, resting his head on the cold floor of the den.

Emeraldeye smiled, taking the cobwebs from Miasmakit's tail, and placed them over the gash on Vieledmist's side and a few other wounds that were still bleeding. He pulled out a few dock leaves and spat out a wad a chewed marigold on them, then mixed in a few other herbs. He spread those on the wounds. Vieledmist winced at the pain and clenched his jaw, but stayed relatively calm.
"Rest. I'll have a comfy nest for you before long, but for now just avoid moving your back leg too much and don't rub the cobwebs or poultice off," He meowed matter-of-factly, moving on to Shadowcore. "You should be okay. Just take it easy for a few days."

Once Emeraldeye was done dressing the warrior's wounds, she wriggled under the injured leg on her belly, using her back to keep the leg propped up and correctly elevated, shrugging off the smell of blood and herbs that gathered in her nose and the poultice that rubbed along her spine, causing the fur to become oily with residue.

Shadderscream, having finished the mouse with Featherpaw, got up and walked a few steps into the camp clearing, raising his head high to see into the medicine cat's den, slightly alarmed at all those who had rushed past him in a frenzy. "What the....." He shook his head and continued over towards the den, waving his tail to Featherpaw in uncertainty.

Featherpaw trotted after him, curious to see what was happening. She noticed Shadowcore walking away from Emeraldeye's den with a grim expression. She shifted her gaze until she saw Vieledmist lying on his side. "What happened?" She asked, stopping herself as she started padding to the den.

Emeraldeye popped his head out of the den and said, "There was a fox attack. Shadowcore is fine, but Vieledmist needs his rest." He disappeared back in.

Miasmakit turned her head and looked at Featherpaw from beneath the grey deputy and hissed in a low voice,"You better leave this cat alone or you'll be in this den as well after finding thistle and thorns in your nest!" Her dark tail lashed irritably, crimson eyes flashing.